hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
