everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
