I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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