I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
