You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
i think my cat just said my name.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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