I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize