love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
