I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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