it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
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