Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
