oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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