i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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