So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
