I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
