That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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