Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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