My room smells like vodka and shame
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
