i permit you to call me
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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