Say something about gay babies.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
