so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize