another moral hangover. fuck.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
