He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Randomize
