Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
