dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
