You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
