Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
