It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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