I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
