Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
