Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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