I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
