It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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