did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
