the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
