Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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