i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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