is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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