can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
