yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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