Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize