I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
