I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
You're like the curious george of whores
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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