I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
