I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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