I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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