PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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