I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
