So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
