do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
