i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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